The BS
Everybody that is dealing with a chronic illness and requires medical attention constantly will agree with me: it gets overwhelming to deal with insurance policies and coverage, expenses, and the medical system. Nobody seems to know exactly what is the coverage, why this or that doesn’t get covered, why paying this extra or why can you just get the medication by brand. No, they have to give you the cheap pills made in China that make you sicker than the illness itself?!
Ugh. Organizing appointments and blood work, doing dialysis every day every 4 hours, and feeling ill makes it very hard to be myself again. I don’t know how to be sane.
Meditation has been for a while my safe place. I have to say, it is what will save me from going crazy. I can’t allow depression to hit me – I need to continue living one day at a time.
I have to say that it is very weird, because overall, I have something that reminds me constantly to be content. Being content will give me the strength I need to continue. And I better smile because at the end, nobody will live my life but me. And I love my life.
